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#46. The Mandalorian, Baby Yoda, and Acela First Class

2019-12-12 · 1:01:26

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Five episodes into Disney+'s The Mandalorian, the three land in very different places. Vic is the enthusiast, handing out an A-minus on the strength of the pilot's Gatling-cannon shootout ("like a scene from The Wild Bunch"), IG-11 finally showing what IG-88 never could in Empire, and the bite-sized 35-to-40-minute runtimes; he also defends Mando's anti-droid bigotry on the grounds that "you've got to put it in context," which JVL immediately likens to excusing Jefferson's slaveholding. Sonny loves that this is a genuine episodic television drama released weekly — "if you can do any one thing, and that one thing is kill the model of dumping everything on the internet at once, it will be worth every penny" — but says it inherits every weakness of the old mold: the Bryce Dallas Howard-directed Seven Samurai riff "looks cheap and it looks small," like the Vietnam flashbacks in Magnum P.I., and the young assassin in the Tatooine episode is among the worst actors he's ever seen. JVL is sourest, arguing the acting is weak across the board except Werner Herzog, that he literally clocked the episodes and nothing of importance happens in the final five minutes of any of them, and that the thing is structured not like a show but like a video game of NPCs, quests and armor upgrades. All three agree Baby Yoda is a perfect piece of design and the ideal way to move a legacy property forward, and they spend a full fifteen minutes relitigating The Last Jedi, including JVL's ten-percent theory that Rian Johnson poisoned the franchise on purpose as indie performance art, plus an Axios chart showing pre-release search interest in The Rise of Skywalker as a flat line. Frozen 2 held the box office at $35 million, with Knives Out second and Ford v Ferrari third around $6.7 million. Up front, JVL cashes in 27,000 forgotten Amtrak points for an Acela first-class upgrade and comes back a changed man — a mahogany lounge you enter by ringing a bell, its own platform entrance, two-and-one seating, free booze, hot towels and a croissant strata — which prompts his wife's verdict that he'd have made a great priest, and leads into a long quiet-car vigilantism debate and Sonny pulling up the Larry Craig Union Station story mid-tangent. Vic, meanwhile, walks back into Morton's after years away to check on his wine locker and finds a surprisingly velvety 2007 Alexander Valley Cabernet still waiting, which the hosts concede is the most one-percent conversation the show has ever had.

From the show notes

#cdata-section -------------- In this latest episode, sponsored by DoorDash, we discuss the Disney+ series The Mandalorian and the future...

Full transcript
Guest00:00:00Bounty hunting is a complicated profession.
Vic00:00:23Hello and welcome to another edition of the Sub-Beacon, sponsored by DoorDash. I'm Victor Matus, along with Sonny Bunch and Jonathan V. Last. Just a reminder, the Sub-Beacon is available on iTunes, Google Play, and Stitcher. Look on our podcast, search for Sub-Beacon, you'll easily find us. Please subscribe, tell your friends, leave a review. Gentlemen, how are we? JVL, what's going on?
JVL00:00:45You know, sometimes it's good not to know. Right? There are things that you don't know about. Like how the sausage is made. It can't bother you. I had to go to New York yesterday. And I took the Accella. And I discovered as I was booking online.
Vic00:01:01I'm sorry, could you pronounce that again? The Accella?
JVL00:01:05The Accella? Is that not how it is pronounced?
Sonny00:01:06You were writing a spreadsheet?
JVL00:01:08Up to New York? Accella?
Sonny00:01:10Accella. The Accella. Accella. Whatever it is. I was thinking the train. It's one C. It's not A-C-C-E-L-A, right?
JVL00:01:17It's Accella. If Joe Biden tells you that that's how the Amtrak train is pronounced, then that's well. He would never say that, though. Because he's not an insane person.
Vic00:01:25We're off to a great start.
JVL00:01:26Anyway, you were writing a spreadsheet. And I discovered that I had like 27,000 Amtrak points, which I had never... You didn't even realize. This is like 20 years worth of Amtrak frequent flyer. And so I purchased for myself a first class upgrade for the Accella.
Vic00:01:44Accella. Accella. That's a big... No, you were with the Castilian accent. It's the Accella.
Sonny00:01:49The Accella is what you write in Barthelona.
Vic00:01:52He played for Georgetown, Accella.
Sonny00:01:54Harrington. And then made a run for the Knicks. Accella is the...
JVL00:01:57The play by Shakespeare. I had thought to myself, well, the Accella is as good as it gets. The Accella is so much better than the original. Because it's all business class. It is all business class. First class can't be anything. It's probably just means that your drinks are free. What more do you get? Yes. Oh, wait a minute. That is not what it means.
Vic00:02:18Do they bring you your food? Not to step on your... It's not just a better train. Tell us.
JVL00:02:24It's a better life.
Sonny00:02:25It's a better standard of living. You get into the... It's very Jeremy. It's very Jeremy McGuire.
JVL00:02:28Accella Club beforehand. And the Accella Club is what a train station would be like if it was civilized. Yes.
Vic00:02:35Well, if you watch movies like The Untouchables. You know, the train station in Chicago.
JVL00:02:39For instance, when I got to the train station yesterday, I had to use the bathroom. And so I walked into the Union Station restroom and then I turned around and walked out. And I just said, I'll hold it. I held it till New York.
Vic00:02:53When I was in New York, I held it because the Union Station bathroom. Oh, my God. Yeah. No, it's like Port Authority 1979.
Sonny00:03:00Which senator was it that had an adventure in the Union Station bathroom?
Vic00:03:05Union Station bathroom?
JVL00:03:06No, nobody would do that at the Union Station. That's gross.
Sonny00:03:08Not even Jim McGreevy would do that.
JVL00:03:10Really?
Vic00:03:10I draw the line.
JVL00:03:11So I turned around and that's when I realized, wait a minute. My first class ticket gets me. No. He was in that Union Station. He was an airport, not Union Station.
Vic00:03:20It's not Union Station. It was like back in his home state.
JVL00:03:23Yes. So I went into the Acela Club and everything is monogamy.
Sonny00:03:27On March 17th, 2006, gay rights activist Michael Rogers reported on sexual liaisons between U.S. Senator Larry Craig and unnamed individuals in Washington, D.C.'s Union Station.
JVL00:03:37Boom.
Vic00:03:38That's the wide stance story?
Sonny00:03:40I think there was more in addition to that. Wow. Okay.
JVL00:03:43You know, there's never just one. I guess so.
Sonny00:03:45That's right.
Vic00:03:45If they've done it once, you know they've been around.
JVL00:03:47JVF. It's just that one time.
Vic00:03:48Please, tell us about it though.
JVL00:03:49Anyway, you get in there and everything is beautiful and mahogany and the chairs are comfortable and there is nobody washing out there. There's no underwear in the sink.
Sonny00:03:59We're sitting on the sink. I mean, it really sounds like you're not getting the full train experience at this point.
JVL00:04:04And even better, when the train is ready, the nice lady Lisa at the front makes an announcement and says, hey guys, if you're on the 2119 that is ready, you can just head out the side. You know what you don't have to do? Go back out to stand in a line with 50 people to then rush in with the animals. Yeah, animals. And so we just happily- We get into a line because I was sitting on a beautiful leather chair working, and then I just walked the side. Do you have a- The Acela Lounge has their own entrance to the platform? Does it have its own private Wi-Fi? Yes. So you're not on the train Wi-Fi or the- You're not even on the same Wi-Fi as the animals.
Vic00:04:44I caught a glimpse of the Acela Club at Union Station.
JVL00:04:47It is literally like a speakeasy where there's just these mahogany doors, but they don't open. You have to ring a bell, and then a blue light comes on to tell you that you're allowed to open it.
Sonny00:04:56It's like the- It's like in- It's like in Star Wars, the little thing that pops out of the door. Yes.
JVL00:05:00And then you get onto the train, and they are three-seat row configurations, not four, which means there's all sorts of extra space, which means all the seats are wider, and some of the seats are one-bys. Oh, you mean two and one. Two and one, which means that, again, that's just more space, so each seat is wider and bigger. You're never touching a person. The guy sitting next to me in first class was a giant. He had to be six-foot-six. It's seven and four hundred pounds, and my elbows never touched his once. Wow. I was like in my own little throne. Why didn't you take one of the one chairs? Then, because they are assigned seating, so you're not fighting over seats with people. You know what seat you're going to. Wow. 6A. There's a menu. They deliver a menu.
Vic00:05:47Like a plane.
JVL00:05:47Like a plane, and it's not the same food that's in the cafe car. It's like real food.
Vic00:05:53You mean you don't get the DiGiorno pizza?
JVL00:05:54They bring you whatever.
Vic00:05:55That's too bad.
Sonny00:05:55Your loss. Whatever you want. Whatever you want.
JVL00:05:57At the end, they come by with steaming hot towels, the way you do on a first class flight.
Sonny00:06:03What did you get to eat?
JVL00:06:05I got the croissant strata, which was a confection with some croissant, some artichoke, some spinach, some parmesan, and egg.
Vic00:06:15It was delicious.
JVL00:06:17Oh, this is a breakfast? Yeah.
Guest00:06:20That's nice.
JVL00:06:21I can't go back. I can't go back to business class. I won't do it. I won't. But the problem is, I was fine with that before I knew it.
Vic00:06:30Yeah, yeah, yeah.
JVL00:06:31And now? And before that, you would have been fine on the Northeast Regional. From now?
Vic00:06:35No, it is.
JVL00:06:36What matter? I can't go back. I can't do it.
Vic00:06:39But at some point, you will. And it's going to suck. Yes.
Sonny00:06:42Sonny. Well, it's like the Seinfeld, right? Where Jerry says he has to go into first class because he knows what the difference is. She doesn't know what she's... She doesn't have any idea. That's right. And that is why.
JVL00:06:51I never imagined on a train there could be such a difference.
Vic00:06:54Is it all... It's not quiet car. The best people?
JVL00:06:59It's not quiet car per se. This is the one thing. It is not a quiet car. And the very important people in the first class car.
Sonny00:07:07They got talking.
JVL00:07:08They don't hear the stories. They not only talk to each other. That's how the stories are leaked. Because they all know each other. They all know each other because they're regular commuters back and forth in New York. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And they're on their phones talking about the billion dollar deals that I'm working on. You listen to me, effer. This is a real thing. I had this lady sitting next to me the entire time on her phone. It was on the way. Back like chewing out a series of subordinates over and over and over each time talking about the billion dollar deal she was trying to make happen.
Vic00:07:35And I was just like, this is it. All right. Real thing. Great. I off in the.
Sonny00:07:40Were you wearing a T-shirt? Were you wearing a T-shirt and jeans?
JVL00:07:46I was dressed appropriately for why I went to New York. So puzzle that out. So you were wearing you were wearing an American giant hoodie. I was not. I was wearing my Patagonia fleece. Oh, boy. Black merino wool T-shirt.
Vic00:08:04Oh, yeah.
JVL00:08:05But I dressed up.
Sonny00:08:06I wore shoes, not sneakers. That's good. You know, those are sneakers. That's a that's the right. You wore dress shoes. Well, oh, the loafers slip ons. They look come.
Vic00:08:18Those are barely, barely shoes.
JVL00:08:20I didn't say dress shoes. I said shoes. Did you wear with a bathrobe? Yes. Did you?
Sonny00:08:26Shoes. Now, did you kill the raccoon before you made the shoe from its from its flesh? Yes. Pretty sure this is the other part.
JVL00:08:34The other parts are now a coonskin hat cap. Anyway. Yes. The first class train thing is real. And what's funny is over the weekend, my wife and I had a conversation about my attempt at discernment when I was young about whether or not I thought I might have a vocation to the priesthood. And when I mentioned this to her, she simply laughed at me. You like. There are things that are too nice. And and when I told her yesterday, I was like texting her like, oh, you won't believe what it's like. And she said, yeah, you would have been a great priest. Wow. Wow.
Vic00:09:09Did that humble you?
Sonny00:09:11No, no. It just made me want it all the more.
Vic00:09:15You know what I.
Sonny00:09:16You got that first taste of sin. You're like, oh, give me the rest of that apple. Give me the rest of that apple.
JVL00:09:20Can't say a scilla without sin. Or something.
Vic00:09:24Do you notice who? When you go to a quiet car, it's never always that quiet. There's always somebody who violates it. And who is that? You know who they are? They. Oh, yeah. They foreigners, people who don't speak like the language per se, like for the visiting like a tourist. I don't mean like outsiders, but I mean, you know, like people who are tourists. This is the dumbest thing I've ever heard. And you will hear them.
Sonny00:09:48I've never heard a foreigner talk on the quiet car. Oh, I haven't.
Vic00:09:50The last time I was in the quiet car, it was all in another language and he was on the phone, but nobody bothered to tell him. What language? I don't know. I don't know.
JVL00:09:57Gibberish.
Vic00:09:58I don't know. Some sort of bird clicking. I don't know. It was something from the east. This is. This is. Somewhere in the east. This is. This is nonsense racism.
JVL00:10:06Sonny, where are you on the quiet car? Because I find the quiet car to be an amazing. You know, I'm pro quiet car too, but there is a very difficult balancing act in the quiet car because on the one hand. They don't see the sign. That's why they're speaking. The minute there is an infraction, if it is not cracked back upon. Oh. It becomes anarchy. And so one person starts taking a phone call. Somebody has to be there. The jerk. And say it. And you know that. The conductor doesn't tell them, please turn it off.
Sonny00:10:30One of you. Then it.
JVL00:10:31Yeah. I've had this happen. Oh yeah.
Sonny00:10:32By the end of the trip, literally the entire car is on their phones. Fortunately, that has never happened to me. And I have always been in situations where the conductor immediately comes and like puts a stop to it.
JVL00:10:41But here's the problem. The other end of the scale is when you have the quiet Nazis. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. The people who are the vigilantes. The shishers. Who want to take it into their own hands. I once saw a woman wrap a guy on the head with a newspaper. Like a dog? Like a dog. Like a dog has been bad? Because he had fallen asleep and was emitting the quietest snores you've ever heard.
Sonny00:11:03I think that's totally fine.
JVL00:11:05Snoring because you've fallen asleep on the quiet car or hitting somebody in the head to say. Waking him up to make him stop snoring.
Sonny00:11:11In a very mean way. Stop it.
JVL00:11:12This is the quiet car.
Sonny00:11:13Yeah. I think that's fine. What did the guy do?
JVL00:11:15I think the vigilantes are worse than the people who are the scofflaws. Well, that's the question. Who's worse?
Sonny00:11:19Look, I.
JVL00:11:20What did the guy do?
Sonny00:11:23Yeah. I was maybe more outraged than he was.
JVL00:11:26I wanted to just like knock her teeth in. Yeah. No, I. He must have been embarrassed.
Sonny00:11:30I mean, it's terrible. So there's kind of an analogous. She was not nice about it either. There's an analogous situation in movie theaters, right? Which is when somebody is talking or using their phone in a movie theater, there is always the chance that the other patrons stepping in and asking them to stop will lead the situation to escalate. That's why you need the authorities to do it for you. Right, right, right.
JVL00:11:51It only works when the authority. That's why the Alamo is great. Because the Alamo, they take care of those problems for you.
Sonny00:11:56So like in the ideal world, there are agents of the state. Broken windows. In the ideal world, agents of the state are viciously patrolling this. Yes.
JVL00:12:07Because if they're viciously patrolling, they can use minimal interference.
Sonny00:12:11Right, right. So, but in a non-ideal world, I'm okay with a little bit of vigilantism. But eventually, you're right that like there are two things that could happen. Either nobody says anything and it spirals out of control or everybody starts yelling at everybody else and that's even worse. So, I'm kind of torn on this. I don't have a strong opinion either way. I just usually sit there and hope it stops. That's the way it is. I'm just along for the ride.
JVL00:12:37When you get on, you got to slip the conductor a 20 and just say, can you just please make sure you stick your head in every couple minutes and really keep the lid on this car for us.
Sonny00:12:45Fortunately, again, I have never actually had this problem. And it was weird.
JVL00:12:49Like paying protection money for the quiet car.
Sonny00:12:52So, one time I was coming back from New York. And I'm sitting in the quiet car on, I think, the regional.
JVL00:13:00I don't think it was even the Acela.
Sonny00:13:02And I sat down in the quiet car. And I get my computer out to start working. And a guy leans over and talks to me. He was like, you know, you could sit over here. And I was like, who the do you think you are? Who is talking to me on the quiet car? I look over. It was the best man in my wedding who just happened to be on the train. And I was like, oh, hey, what's going on? And so, we talked. We were both, like, sitting there working in the quiet car, like, awkwardly not talking to each other. And I texted my wife. And I was like, oh, man, you'll never believe who's here. It's my friend. And she was like, why are you still there in the quiet car? Go to the cafe. I was like, oh, that's a good idea, actually. So, then we went to the cafe.
JVL00:13:43Because otherwise, it's like you're in school trying to commit without the teacher catching you.
Sonny00:13:47Exactly. So, like, we were, like, kind of whispering very lately, like, hey, let's go. But then we were like, let's just go to the cafe car.
JVL00:13:54The best is if you could have just gone. Like, open up Twitter and DM'd each other while sitting next to each other in the quiet car. We could have done that. It would have been amazing.
Vic00:14:01What is the bathroom like in the business class? Is it different than the other one? Exactly the same.
JVL00:14:05But probably clean. Like, you could probably just sit on it. Fewer people. And they don't let the other people from the other cars come into your bathroom.
Vic00:14:16You know, the worst is when you're standing there and then you hit all these bumps and it's, like, everywhere. It's, like, I hate to be the woman behind me. Dusty's in for a real treat.
Sonny00:14:23Lady was like it when I got here. Is there a constant attendant in the first class of the train? There are two. Two.
JVL00:14:34Coming back and forth. Would you like anything else? Would you like another drink? Would you like another glass of Chablis, sir? Would you like a screwdriver? What can we get you? Would you like more dessert? More everything. Is the alcohol free?
Sonny00:14:45Everything is free.
JVL00:14:46Oh, come on. Even the booze?
Vic00:14:47Everything.
JVL00:14:48Wow. Well, it's worth considering if you have the means. Thank you, JVL.
Vic00:14:55How are you? Sonny, what's going on?
Sonny00:14:58Not as good as JVL. I know.
Vic00:15:00He's doing the high life. Apparently.
Sonny00:15:01I am incredibly busy all the time on a very secret project that I can't tell anybody about just yet. Are you starting a new podcast? Check my Twitter feed the next two days. Thursday. This Thursday. Today. Today. Thursday. Today and tomorrow on Friday. And Friday. All right. Today. I might have some big announcements to make. At 11. We're going to have some. Just keep this in mind. Promo code SubBeacon. Just remember that when you're looking at my feed.
Vic00:15:26Promo code SubBeacon. Okay.
Sonny00:15:27But no, I am working on a new project. It's very secret and it's going to be awesome. And I'm excited to tell everybody about it finally. But not just yet.
Vic00:15:37Okay.
Sonny00:15:38Big tease. But you're not very excited.
Vic00:15:40How are you, man? I am doing fine. So last Friday, I think, I was on one of my extended holiday lunches, which is for about six hours. And I ended up at night with a friend. And just on a lark, I said, because I was listening to somebody else was telling me about going to Morton's. I think it was listener Grant Addison was talking about it because he loves Morton's. I said, ah, Morton's has seen better days. But I thought, you know, what the heck? Is your locker still there? So that's what I was curious about. I knew the people who I didn't want to see because of the awkwardness were gone. We're gone, right?
JVL00:16:16Oh, the woman who was gone.
Vic00:16:18Annie Festa's gone. Catherine Moskowitz is gone. How did you know they were gone?
JVL00:16:22Have you kept any tabs on them? I have sources. Following them on LinkedIn?
Vic00:16:26I have sources at other restaurants who I know that used to work there. I said, what about so-and-so? What about so-and-so? And they'll tell me, right? So I walk in. It still looks like a Vegas brothel, right? Because it's like the black and the black lacquer. They redid it all. And it looks terrible. I love dark one. So I go, I recognized the one woman, but we were never that friendly. So I didn't really feel like it's like, hey, you know, so I looked. The locker was still there all the way in the bottom. But they have all this Christmas stuff now. So there's like a table blocking part of it. So but I could tell it was mine. I go in to the. Bar and then a waitress comes over. I said, you know, I actually have a locker and I think I have like a bottle in there. Can you I just want the bottle is fine. And she says, sure. So she goes away about 15 minutes later, an assistant manager. Again, I don't know this guy. These people come in, comes in, and he asked which is like where. And then he comes over to me, looks at me. He's like, hi.
JVL00:17:16And it's like this is like somebody he's never seen. And I go, hi, how are you? You take your locker away.
Vic00:17:21No, no. So he goes, so. And he's holding the body goes. So you asked for. The bottle of wine. I go, yes. He goes, well, we have this one here. It's from 2007.
Sonny00:17:33It's a real vintage.
Vic00:17:34Real vintage. It's a real vintage. It's a real vintage. I said, yeah. I said, you know, I don't work in the city anymore, so I just don't come in anymore.
JVL00:17:41I moved to Texas.
Vic00:17:42I moved to Texas. I moved to Niagara Falls with my girlfriend. I moved to Vienna. Virginia. So and I just said, yeah, you know, so I just don't come in as often. Oh, no, no problem. But he goes, why don't we just open it? I said, you know what? Why don't we decant it? I said, OK. So he goes, well, he comes. He's like, well, the cork broke, but we're going to still get it out. Like, OK, good. So they didn't have it laid on its side. It was on its side. And yet.
Sonny00:18:08What kind of bottle was it?
Vic00:18:10Alexander Valley, a Cabernet, I think.
Sonny00:18:12I am almost certain. I was almost certainly at the wine tasting where you bought that.
Vic00:18:18I was going to say, you were probably there. That's, I think, when and I think that's when Paul Ryan appeared, I think, at the same party. But we were at they used to do these tastings and that's how I got this bottle. So he decants it. And then like a little bit later, you know, we take a sniff and it actually smells pretty good. So he says, wow. And I said, I'll try it. So I try it. And it was actually surprisingly very smooth, velvety smooth like silk. And then I'm still burping it. And then and I told the guy, so you should try one yourself. Oh, no, no, no, sir. I shouldn't. I go, no, no, have a little bit. He's like, OK, just a little bit. So then we start drinking. Just the tip. Just just, you know, and you know how that goes. And so we started chatting. I said, yeah, I used to come here. I used to know all these people, but they're all gone. Right. And they go, yeah, they've all left. And then he says and he says, oh, but, you know, the the new guy here is Lloyd. And I go, Lloyd, who used to be an assistant here a long time ago before he left. He goes, yeah, yeah. He came back. I go, really? I said, oh, I knew Lloyd from back in the day. He's here right now. I'll go get him. So he comes back and he was very he said, Vic, you're back. I said, hi. And he goes, listen, listen. He says, it's all new and improved. Got everything. I mean, do they have do they have good steaks again? He says, I convinced him. I said, I want to take this job only if it's my way or the highway. And and I got the purveyor just for this restaurant. You got to come back. And so I said, you know what? Maybe maybe I'll check it out. But on my way out, who do I see? But a bus boy, he's actually an older Chinese gentleman who happens to do double duties there and at the palm. And he saw me goes, oh, what are you doing here? That's fair.
JVL00:19:52Thank you.
Vic00:19:53Thank you. Oh, what are you doing here? And I.
JVL00:19:55Oh, remember, Victorino Matus is a quarter Chinese is part Filipino and Chinese. So we're we're OK.
Vic00:20:02I can do this. Oh, it's so good to see you. He said. And I said, oh, good. Good to see you, too. This is not appropriate. Is it this conversation? It's all right. It's all right.
JVL00:20:11It's OK. It's right on the edge.
Vic00:20:13Right on the edge. It's all good. Yeah. You're doing. But yeah, maybe I'll see you at the other place. I go, yeah, maybe I will. And funny enough, that guy never made it home that night.
JVL00:20:23Missing persons report.
Vic00:20:25Anyway.
JVL00:20:25So that I mean, listeners should know again, you are one of the fancy people who has his own locker. This is why I never I didn't I've never paid for it. For the record, it's a crazy. This is this is the most you're on the wall at the pond. This is this is the most one percent.
Sonny00:20:41It's so one percent conversation that we have ever between the first class. I sell a first class. I sell a first class and the wine.
Vic00:20:47I'm complaining that I've never been a seller first class. And then I then I have a lot.
Sonny00:20:52I'm just a humble, just a humble back to you in a second.
JVL00:20:55I'll get back to you. Let me think about what do you have to do to lose your locker privileges?
Vic00:20:59I don't.
JVL00:21:00Oh, you know, like if it's empty, if that was your last bottle of wine, you know, when
Vic00:21:04who is what's his name? You can help me out here.
JVL00:21:06I'm drawing a Tony Kornheiser.
Vic00:21:08No, Philadelphia Eagles guy. Everybody had so much headache with him.
JVL00:21:11He doesn't have no no receiver and drove everybody crazy. Earl Owens. Thank you.
Vic00:21:16And, you know, and he when he left Philly, he had a locker, I believe, at the Capitol Grill, and they emptied that locker when they send him the bottle.
JVL00:21:25I think they did a prohibition style where they dumped it on the side of the name goes
Vic00:21:29into the gutter. Yeah.
JVL00:21:30So he did. You had your name on the wall. Smith and Wansky. Yeah, you did, too.
Vic00:21:35But we did. I didn't pay for this. It just happened to ask on a lot. Question. Question. I don't know why the Weekly Standard went out of business.
Sonny00:21:41Question. Yes. Question. Did you ask? Why did they end? Did you ask Lloyd what you what what if you can keep the lot like what was there any discussion? No, no. You don't want to bring it up. Are you ready for this? Vic, you got to come back in. We got to. We got a wine tasting coming up.
Vic00:21:56He told me about it because I'm going to send your name to Kevin, our wine guy. You're going to come back. And then the other guy goes, well, let's take a look. You know, there were a couple of the bottles. I go, what are you talking about? I thought that was I really I visually only saw one bottle. I have four bottles in there still.
Sonny00:22:10Do you have one that is basketball themed?
JVL00:22:13Did you buy that?
Sonny00:22:14Because I'm pretty sure I bought that one. We got it. We got to drink that before I move. I will check.
Vic00:22:19There's a Mayomi. I will check. It was like a basketball. I want to say it was like a Larry Bird wine. It was a white Zinfandel.
Sonny00:22:26No, it was a white Zinfandel. It was a no, it's like a it was from Yellowtail and it was Red Bicycle.
Vic00:22:34No, I remember it was like the cheapest bottle of red because at that time we were caught up in the reverie, the reverie. We were hammered. We were hammered on wine.
Sonny00:22:43And I was like, I was like, sure, $60 for a bottle of wine. I'm saving like $12 because it's 20% off, you know, you know, and made me think about
Vic00:22:50why, you know, things, little things I like about steakhouses. But you know what I like about steakhouses, you know, when your steak is ready, when they bring the knives out.
JVL00:22:58Speaking of which, over the weekend, Knives Out.
Vic00:23:00Hey, that was really good. Stayed in second place with $4.2 million because I did not feel like making a Frozen 2 yet another. It'll be there for the next like four or five ones. Frozen 2, which remained at the top of the box office with $35 million. And in third place again, Ford vs. Ferrari with $6.7 million, roughly. Box office thoughts, the top three stayed the same. And what is coming out next weekend?
Sonny00:23:25Next weekend is Richard Jewell. Or this weekend. This weekend is this forthcoming weekend. We should definitely talk about Richard Jewell.
Vic00:23:32We'll have a lot to talk about.
JVL00:23:33Oh, I want to talk about the Olivia Wilde controversy. I love this whole story.
Vic00:23:38I didn't know she died. Not Olivia Wilde. I'm sorry.
Sonny00:23:42Kathy Scruggs.
Vic00:23:43Yeah. And she's not related to the Scruggs lawyer, Scruggs? How would I know?
JVL00:23:47I don't know.
Vic00:23:47Maybe it's just a southern name. Who knows?
JVL00:23:49Okay. There's nothing wrong with sleeping with sources to get stories. How do you think? How do you think vodka, how a clear, colorless liquid took over the country was reported out?
Sonny00:24:01Well, what's fascinating. The hard way. We can actually discuss. I've seen the movie. So I've seen the movie. I've seen the movie. I've seen Richard Jewell.
Vic00:24:08I already got my material and then I did it. That was the worst part.
Sonny00:24:12I will say that I do think a lot of this discussion is based on a misreading of that scene. Have you seen? I have. I have. He just said that. I literally just said that.
JVL00:24:22I'm still thinking of your Cheeto. I'm thinking more jokes. I was thinking of more jokes. That's right. Okay. Go ahead. Anyway.
Sonny00:24:28I think it's based on a misreading of the scene because I don't. When you watch it, ask yourself if she's sleeping with this person to get information or if she's sleeping with this person because it's Jon Hamm.
JVL00:24:40I want you to think about that while you're watching.
Sonny00:24:42Wow. Okay. That's a good point. Very good, Sonny. But we can discuss that next week. I don't know, man. I don't have any real strong thoughts here. Knives Out is doing fine. $63 million. Ford V4. Ferrari is chugging along.
JVL00:24:56It'll probably get past $100 million this weekend. Good for them. Does this get Rian Johnson out of movie jail?
Sonny00:25:03Rian Johnson was never really in movie jail. Exactly. He was only in Disney jail. But even there, they're keeping him very close to the fold.
JVL00:25:12Because they don't want him spilling.
Sonny00:25:13They've said a lot of, they have, until this last week, they have said nothing but nice things about The Last Jedi. And what is interesting is, I was tweeting about this before the show yesterday on Wednesday, that there was, there's a big New York Times story that kind of like interviews with all the cast members about, you know what. And if you read between the lines of that story, there's a lot of, we are so glad J.J. Abrams is back because we were really excited to finish the story that he was telling. And it's like, okay, that's interesting. And then a couple days ago, there was a story with headlines like, even Finn has questions about some of the choices made in The Last Jedi. And I was like, okay. So there is a lot of sub-Rosa rumbling from very official sources, very on the record that people, I think, in Disney World recognize that The Last Jedi made a series of very crucial mistakes and that one of the ways that they will get fans to come back for The Rise of Skywalker is at least acknowledging that there are concerns. Mistakes were made. About the way the series has gone. Now here's, it's, again, this is all kind of between the lines and, you know, I wouldn't say it's, I wouldn't say that, nobody's coming out and saying the haters were right, Last Jedi sucks, blah, blah, blah. No, it's criminology. But it is, if you're doing your Star Wars-ology on this, your Kennedy-ology on this, it is very clear that they are not at all comfortable with how excitement levels are for this film I think. And I, I...
JVL00:26:59You've seen the graph that Axios did with, like, the searches, online searches for them?
Sonny00:27:03So could you just describe that briefly?
JVL00:27:05It was, so just showing online searches for the movies in the month leading up to their release. And for Force Awakens, the, you know, the bar goes all the way up to the top of the screen. And for Last Jedi, it goes, like, halfway up the screen. And for this Rise of Skywalker, you can barely see the bar. It's a flat line. I mean, it's like... It's like a flat line. Nobody is interested.
Vic00:27:28They beat it to death.
Sonny00:27:29I, I... And this, I, and I, you know, I hate to say this because it just reflects my own biases, but this is exactly how I feel about the movie. Me too.
JVL00:27:37Yeah.
Sonny00:27:38I have no, I have no interest in this film, aside from the kind of morbid curiosity of what they do to end it. Because the whole thing has been... We're talking about The Mandalorian today, right? Speaking of Star Wars, that's what we're talking about. That's what we're going to be talking about. So, I feel okay talking a little bit. At long last. I feel like we're talking, I feel okay talking about this a little bit now. It's a soft preview. Because, because here's, here's the, the, you know, I, every, this is the first Star Wars movie that I can remember that every trailer I've seen has induced less interest in me than the one before it. I remember when the teaser came out, I was like, oh, fine, I'm back in. And then I saw a trailer, I was like, okay, what's the story? And then I saw another trailer, I was like, okay, that's, those are great shots of the old movies. What's in this new one? And then there was one more trailer, I was like, okay, I still don't understand what's going on here.
JVL00:28:31Oh, they're going to come back together, then Kylo and Rey are going to join forces to fight the Emperor.
Sonny00:28:34And so, so.
JVL00:28:35Maybe they'll throw him down an air shaft.
Sonny00:28:37So, the problem, again, the problem, the problem with The Last Jedi is that the conversation around it got so toxic so quickly and so, like, intensely political and ideological that it was impossible to discuss the strengths and weaknesses of that movie in any reasonable or logical way. I, like, you had to either be full in.
JVL00:28:59Refresh my memory, because our discussion of it was barely political at all. It was about. Agreed. No, no, no, no.
Sonny00:29:04Agreed.
JVL00:29:05Agreed. The movie was.
Sonny00:29:07Some people, some people were reasonable and responsible about it, like, say, the people in this room. But the, the conversation online very quickly turned into an argument about toxic fandom and how evil the fans are. Oh, that's right. Yeah, I remember that. And how much, how much, how, how conservatives hate this movie because they hate diversity. But we are good liberals. We love diversity. So the movie is the best movie ever. And if you don't think it's the best movie ever, you're a reactionary racist. And I was like, okay. And I remember watching all of this happen in real time thinking, okay, but the real problem here is that the, all of the stuff that doesn't involve Ray and Luke and Kylo is bad. And like, even the Ray and Luke and Kylo stuff, I could see an argument that it's like a betrayal of, you know, what the movie's pre, what the movie's predecessors were doing, blah, blah, blah. But I actually like. I like the one thing that Johnson did that I really liked was the idea of getting away from the Skywalkers and like, this is, this is, we need a new thing. This is, we're going to, we're going to try and cut it off. Right. Except for the fact that you do that at the end of the third movie. Yes. If you're going to do that, you don't do it at the end of the second movie. But anyway, but like, the problem with the problem with The Last Jedi, and I've said this repeatedly over and over again, is that it is essentially two movies. One, one is, I think, pretty good. The Luke, Kylo, Ray stuff. Again, you can disagree. It has like actual natural humor in it. It doesn't feel forced. And the other movie is terrible and starts with like a cranky acres bit. Like literally like a, a fake phone call to, that could have, that could have been on a terrible Comedy Central show in the late nineties.
Vic00:30:38Yes. I remember that. So. Cranky anchors.
Sonny00:30:41Remember cranky anchors? Well done. No, but it, it, so anyway, the problem is nobody had that conversation. Everybody had this meta conversation about Trump.
JVL00:30:50We had that conversation.
Sonny00:30:51Everybody had that. Yes, we had that conversation, but everybody else was talking about Trump. Trump and racism.
Vic00:30:55You weren't allowed to criticize Rose. You say, how dare you?
JVL00:30:58And I, I still hold to the view that there is a 10% chance that the entire thing is the greatest work of performance art ever by Rian Johnson, who did all of it intentionally as an indie darling to blow up and hollow out and put a poison meal into the greatest franchise in the history of cinematic franchise. As a statement of the intrinsic subversiveness of indie cinema.
Sonny00:31:29I, I, if, if he came out with an essay saying that I would believe it. I would believe it. Right. So I would totally believe. Yeah. I mean, absolutely. Do you disagree? He burns, he burns the whole series to the ground and destroys the mask. I mean, it's actually, it's actually kind of, he, they destroy the mask.
JVL00:31:45He would throw away the lightsaber. Again, I like a lot of this.
Sonny00:31:51I like, I like the throwing away the lightsaber. The, the smashing the mask. The mask was like clearly designed as an FU to J.J. Abrams. It was like such an obvious thing. And J.J. Abrams putting the mask back together in the first trailer was like such a clear FU back.
JVL00:32:05Why not just fight about it on Twitter? I mean, honestly. You don't have to do it in the, you don't have to do it in the film.
Sonny00:32:09Just have a slap fight. But, but yeah, I, so anyway, it is very interesting to read some of the press surrounding this film because it feels, it feels very much like Disney and Lucasfilm is. Very nervous about how this movie is going to perform and it's going to open to $200 million and everyone's going to say, all of these movies, all of these movies are doing great. It does it.
Vic00:32:36So as opposed to the Mandalorian, which I think all the fans like by and large, right?
JVL00:32:43Would you say all of them, all of them?
Vic00:32:47And it was, is it, is it all, is it created by Jon Favreau?
JVL00:32:52Jon Favreau? Jon Favreau.
Sonny00:32:54Jon Favreau. Jon Favreau is the showrunner. Yeah.
JVL00:32:57Which Jon Favreau? The speech writer. Not the speech writer. The director of, or the writer, the writer of Swingers. Yeah, I can see it. Now that you say it, it has the feel of Jon Favreau. You sound very down on it.
Vic00:33:10I know. Do you want to give a kind of, do we need a review? Do you want a review? Are we going to do the ad now? What do you think?
Sonny00:33:14When are we going to do the ad?
Vic00:33:15Yeah, we better do it now. I was going to say. Don't want to have it too late, man. You want to transition? Got to sell those jeans. Okay, yeah. So, you know, I thought it was interesting. Interesting because I showed you how they go to the bathroom, but I still wonder if they deliver food. Speaking of which, long day at work, tough day at school, still stuck at the office. Treat yourself to the meal you deserve and have your favorite restaurants.
Sonny00:33:37Sorry, did I mess this up?
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JVL00:34:38You think we can do that? I think there's a ton to talk about. Good.
Vic00:34:41JVL, so like Sonny said, I get the sense you are non-plussed by Disney Plus's Mandalorian.
JVL00:34:50Yes. We can talk about that in a minute, but first I want to know what you think. Honestly, I mean, I care what Sonny thinks too, but I am deeply, I deeply want to know what the people think, especially the people who you and I have almost the same preferences all the way around the block when it comes to Star Wars.
Vic00:35:08Yeah, by and large. No nudity. No, but it's not that kind of a movie, so there's not, you know what, there hasn't been like a really... You can't do quadrants for this, right? No, and you know what, the quadrant system was developed in the 1980s because every movie had nudity, and every movie had gratuitous nudity. These sex scenes, I mean, they all had it, okay? You don't see that anymore.
JVL00:35:28It's terrible.
Vic00:35:29So that doesn't count there. Duration, like Sonny was saying, I like it. It's perfect little bite-sized chunks. What is it, 40, 45 minutes less? 35, 28. Nice.
Sonny00:35:40Yeah, they're 35, 40 minutes a piece. Wonderful.
Vic00:35:42I love it. I like the crayon, but that takes time. That's an investment of time. Okay, plot, easy to understand. I mean, what's not to understand? I mean, I would have liked a scroll open, I guess. That would have been fun. You know, after Return of the Jedi.
JVL00:35:55Only the Star Wars sagas get scrolls. Do you know this? Yes, because- The crawl, you only get it in the Star Wars saga. Well, one doesn't get one. Right, the Star Wars, what do they get? The Star Wars stories. Stories. The Star Wars stories do not get the crawl.
Vic00:36:07And this isn't even in the Star Wars, this is its own thing.
Sonny00:36:10I remember when this was like the most controversial thing in Star Wars fandom. For, God, better times.
Vic00:36:17Yeah, that's right. By comparison to other Star Wars movies, the violence is pretty good. You didn't start- You're not seeing blood, I think, until The Force Awakens, right? And the Stormtrooper mask and Finn and the whole thing, and he's got the blood on him. Otherwise, you didn't really see much blood, per se. Blasters is sort of like the way-
Sonny00:36:35Well, blasters cauterize the wounds. There's not going to be a lot of blood. That's right, that's right.
Vic00:36:38It's a good way to go. You know what else blasters do?
Sonny00:36:43Bounce off armor.
JVL00:36:45Well, when energy weapons are discharged at a lake, they somehow cause the water to- To erupt as if it was a kinetic weapon or a rock breaking the surface.
Sonny00:36:59Okay. Okay. That doesn't bother me. That's interesting.
JVL00:37:03That doesn't bother me. It's just interesting.
Vic00:37:05Help me out here.
Sonny00:37:06He's complaining that the water doesn't sizzle or something. It acts like a cannon's going into it.
JVL00:37:11What movie are we talking about? We're talking about The Mandalorian.
Vic00:37:14I don't remember this.
JVL00:37:15The AT-ST coming- Oh! The one with the sanctuary when they- The worst episode.
Vic00:37:21Yeah, I didn't like that episode. Somebody said out here in- Now we're off as the kids. We're like, what do you mean you didn't like it? The whole, you know, seven samurai thing? I don't know. Is that-
Sonny00:37:29Well, this is the problem with- We can- We'll get to that.
Vic00:37:32Well, this is the Sonny Bunch area here. Okay. So, I thought violence is better. There's a knife that apparently really doesn't have to cut deep to kill the giant rhino.
JVL00:37:42Yeah, isn't that funny? There must be a special nerve cluster. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He knew exactly what he was doing. He might get him right in the eye or something. It was like in the neck. Okay. Also, through the- This is all nitpicking. Okay. Like the Mandalorian nerve punch.
Vic00:37:52So, just based on those three alone, A minus. I enjoyed the things I liked about it. I really liked about it. What did you really like?
JVL00:38:00Tell me about those things.
Vic00:38:01Episode one, the shootout. It was like at the OK Corral or it was like a scene from the Wild Bunch with the Gatling cannon. The IG- IG-11. IG-11. Loved it. You never saw what IG-88 could do in Empire Strikes Back because, of course, they didn't
Sonny00:38:17have that sort of technology. You've been hard for this scene since the first preview.
Vic00:38:20I have since the trailer. And I was not disappointed. And I'm like, you know what?
JVL00:38:24I liked IG-11's personality, too. Well, yes. Me, too. Absolutely funny. I thought that was great.
Vic00:38:29It's funny. It's not, I was going to say KRS-One, but that's the rapper. Oh, what was the one? Targ-One?
JVL00:38:37No, the Rogue One. What's his name? Whose name I forget. But who's the greatest robot ever in the history of movies?
Vic00:38:43Yes, yes. Exactly. So, and- TARS? No. No, TARS is Interstellar.
Sonny00:38:48No, but that's the best robot.
JVL00:38:50K2SO. No, K2SO has displaced TARS as the greatest robot in cinema history.
Sonny00:38:55Oh, is that the one from Rogue One? Yeah. Yes. No, no, but TARS is better.
JVL00:38:57They're 1A and 1B.
Sonny00:38:59TARS is better. How dare you? You take it back. You take back your slander of Sir Christopher. I love TARS.
JVL00:39:05IG-11, love it. Great. So that was crazy. I thought IG-11, I am with you entirely. Okay. For me, he's the highlight of the series so far. Okay. Yes. Too bad he's gone.
Vic00:39:17I have, oh yeah.
JVL00:39:18There must be more to get it all the way up to an A-. Minus, there must be more than I like that robot that was there for seven minutes.
Vic00:39:24Oh, when he went back to get Baby Yoda. What about Baby Yoda? Baby Yoda.
JVL00:39:28First of all, I love Baby Yoda because it's not really beating you over the head the way
Vic00:39:32the Ewoks did or Jar Jar Binks or something. I think he's adorable, but I love that he goes back and gets it from Werner Herzog who's basically, he disappears, but he's basically the King Herod of this series.
JVL00:39:47Why are you here taking this Baby Yoda? Maybe you must have a good Werner Herzog voice.
Guest00:39:53Yes, I do, but it's not right now. I cannot talk about it.
Vic00:39:56Okay, so I like that and he comes back and he kicks a lot of butt and yeah, love it. But again, I did Sanctuary and Tatooine. Okay, great. I like that too.
JVL00:40:10Can I make a quick Netflix?
Vic00:40:12Because in the Creature Cantina, it's not always busy crazy with a band. Sometimes you walk into a band, sometimes you walk into a bar. There's no one there. There's nobody. That's how it is for me most of the day.
Sonny00:40:22Yeah, like when you don't have a budget, when you run out of money and you don't want to spend any money on it. And there's a droid. That's one of those things that happens.
Vic00:40:30And there's a droid working behind.
JVL00:40:32So Disney Plus has been live for a month. And Baby Yoda already has a bigger cultural imprint than anything that Netflix has put on the streaming intertubes in forever.
Sonny00:40:48It doesn't have, well, in a long time. But I would say it doesn't have.
JVL00:40:51No, period. There's nothing Netflix has done that is as instantly iconic as Baby Yoda.
Sonny00:40:56Stranger Things. There was tons of House of Cards. I mean, I like.
JVL00:41:02There's a very niche. There's only HBO level.
Sonny00:41:04I agree with you that Baby Yoda has gone viral. But you are discounting the other things that have gone viral to make your point. Sonny, what did you think? Here are the things that I like about The Mandalorian. One thing that I like about The Mandalorian is its length. It is the natural length of a television drama, which is about 40 minutes. Of course, big in my quiet.
JVL00:41:26Isn't it too long still?
Sonny00:41:28I mean, I think occasionally. And so this is one of the things I don't like about it, that the episodes are very uneven. But we'll get to that in a second. So one thing that I really like about it is that it actually feels like a television show in a very real way. It feels like it's episodic, but it still has that kind of overarching continuity. And it is the natural length of a television story, which is about 42 minutes, right? After you take out ads and all that, an hour-long drama is actually only about 42 minutes of story. And that's what that is. Lee's Company was like 22 minutes or something. Well, that's for a half-hour show, you know? So it is the proper length of time for a television show. It has all of the problems a traditional television. And it comes out once a week. That's another thing I like about it. Isn't that interesting? If you can do any one thing, and that one thing is kill the model of dumping everything on the Internet at once, it will be worth every penny we pay for it.
JVL00:42:31Isn't that an interesting choice by Disney? Yes.
Sonny00:42:35It's an interesting choice in that it bucks the Netflix-Amazon model. But it is not an interesting choice in that they should have been doing this from the start. Oh, I agree. It's an interesting deviation from the norm that is wholly unsustainable. You just can't build a network around putting 12 hours of content out every week on top of all the movies that you're putting out every week. It just doesn't work. But it also keeps the show in the conversation of the culture for longer. We're still talking about Star Wars, The Mandalorian, in a way that we never would with Stranger Things.
Vic00:43:17It makes you wonder why they...
Sonny00:43:18Any of that. So those are the things. And I like that it has the Star Wars stuff. I'm a Star Wars dork. They're fine. I like all that stuff. It's good. I like the kind of man with no name style hero. And I like the trappings of, oh, it's a Western. Oh, it's a samurai. Blah, blah, blah. I like all this. It appeals to me in a very real way. Here's what I don't like about it is that it has all of the weaknesses of an episodic television show. Of the traditional mold, which is that it is very up and down week to week. I thought the first three episodes were pretty good. I thought the fourth episode was kind of terrible. The one that is directed by Bryce Dallas Howard. You said the kids were trying to talk you into it because it's Seven Samurai. Here's the problem. It looks like a television episode version of Seven Samurai. It looks cheap. It looks cheap and it looks small. And it looks like it is shot like a TV show. It just doesn't look good. It doesn't look epic. It doesn't look epic in scope. It doesn't look epic in quality. It just looks small. It's like if you ever see in Magnum P.I. the flashbacks to Vietnam.
Vic00:44:28It's had that same feel.
Sonny00:44:30And I liked the most recent episode, which is the one on Tatooine. But even that episode had a lot of weaknesses to it, which is that one big one. The kid who was like the young assassin who was on the journey with the Mandalorian trying to get the expert lady assassin is one of the worst actors I've ever seen in a feature TV show.
Vic00:44:49I wondered if you were... He was related to Bobby Cannavale, his son of...
Sonny00:44:53No, that actually makes sense because he looks exactly like Bobby Cannavale.
JVL00:44:56He reminded me of Jackie Jr. from The Supremacist. Yeah, he was... I would have preferred Jackie Jr.
Sonny00:45:02He was not good.
JVL00:45:03The acting across the board is incredibly weak.
Sonny00:45:08It's up and down.
JVL00:45:09With the exception of Werner Herzog. It's up and down. And Carl Weathers. Carl Weathers should not have... It was distracting to cast a recognizable person with no real acting skills in that movie. That disposable role. Just cast nobody or find a good actor. Every single actor in this... Gina Carano level. Gina Carano. You're not a big fan of Gina Carano? I'm a huge fan of Gina Carano. Not as an actor, but as a sort of physical presence. What about Amy Sedaris?
Sonny00:45:38Amy Sedaris was good. In the fifth episode.
JVL00:45:41Oh, the...
Sonny00:45:42You didn't like her?
JVL00:45:43In the junkyard?
Vic00:45:44In the shop? In the mechanic?
JVL00:45:46No. No, I did not like it at all. It was like a... It was like a Star Wars attempt to do Woody Harrelson's character from Cheers or something, but without... Yeah. Okay. No, the acting is really, really weak.
Sonny00:46:01I would mostly agree with that. I would mostly agree with that.
JVL00:46:04Did any of this strike you as being tight enough?
Sonny00:46:08What do you mean?
JVL00:46:08The storytelling in... My complaint about the era of streaming television, my chief complaint, is that even though we have these constraints of having to hit certain times for run times and commercial breaks and all that, the result has not been a leaner and more efficient mode of storytelling, but everything gets flabbier.
Sonny00:46:34No, but see, this is one of the things I actually like about this is that, again, the shorter length has helped it avoid that problem I have found. I have not been bored with an episode.
JVL00:46:44I literally clocked this. In each of these episodes, literally... Literally nothing of any importance happens in the final five minutes. Literally nothing. I actually sat and clocked this. When the countdown timer hits five minutes left, you know that everything after that is filler. And these episodes are 34 or 42 minutes long, and every one of them could be 15 minutes. There just isn't enough action. There isn't enough story. There isn't enough action. There is not enough conflict. There are not enough resolutions. All the things which are to be, everything that is in this could be done in a fifth of the time.
Sonny00:47:23But again, I think this, but again, this is one of the ways in which it kind of reminds me of a standard television show, which is that there's...
JVL00:47:33But the old television shows, before TV got good at telling stories.
Sonny00:47:37Yeah, but maybe they... No, this feels like 80s television or 70s television.
JVL00:47:40It doesn't feel like sophisticated, the sophisticated storytelling that we got used to as TV got good.
Sonny00:47:47It is certainly not, it does not feel like a... It doesn't feel like a post-Soprano show.
JVL00:47:51No.
Sonny00:47:52Right? It, and here's, again, another thing is that it looks like a TV show. It is shot like a TV show. It is, it, it looks cheap in a way that like Game of Thrones never looked cheap. Even, even the early seasons of Game of Thrones where it was...
JVL00:48:09Well, that's because Disney just doesn't have the cash on hand to do this right.
Sonny00:48:11No, but it is interesting. It is, it is, it is actually something I've been thinking about. Like why, what are they spending the money on? Because they are spending something like 12 to 15 million dollars an episode. On the show. And I don't know what they're spending the money... Actually, let me look that up real quick. You guys talk amongst yourselves.
Vic00:48:26I, I couldn't believe, I thought it was interesting that they eat salacious crumb. That's one of the great things. You know, I... He's on a skewer. He's like a rotisserie. 15 million dollars.
Sonny00:48:35He's being burned alive. 15 million dollars for an episode. The other salacious crumb... You don't think, you don't think they killed him? Has to watch. That's my favorite. They're watching and crying about it. That's actually my favorite. That's actually my, that was my favorite little thing in the, in the, in the show so far is the one salacious crumb watching the other one be... Roasted to death.
JVL00:48:51And knowing that he's next. I thought a lot about the, a lot about the creature deaths that we are shown. And they do a very interesting job of making sure that we are only seeing creatures die who for the most part we think should have it coming. Right, detestable. Like the Jawas. Oh boy. Yes. Right? So a bunch of the Jawas get disintegrated.
Sonny00:49:11First time we've seen the disintegrator in action. Yes.
JVL00:49:14And, and you know what? We don't feel so bad about it because we know the Jawas are... Trash. They're trash. They look cute, but they are trash creatures. Scavengers. Was the tone what you guys were expecting?
Sonny00:49:28I thought it was going to be darker than this. Yeah. I thought it was supposed to be darker. I thought it was supposed to be like grown up Star Wars.
JVL00:49:32Because we were showing, you know, we got all the Werner Herzog voiceovers, the shots of the Stormtrooper helmets on pikes. Yes. I was expecting something a little more adult. And this is very much a PG confection, which makes total sense, right? You want to launch your Disney. Plus streaming service with a PG thing. And this is a very PG show. So I had to reset my expectations. It's very PG. Some of it worked. So in the episode where he goes chasing, I guess it's the pilot maybe, where he's chasing after the Jawas. Is that the pilot or the second? Second episode. The second episode. And he goes through this long, he's dragged behind the sandcrawler. He fights his way to the top of the sandcrawler. And he finally gets there and he pulls his blaster. And there are 15 of these little Jawas who shoot him with their stupid electric stun guns and he falls off. And that was, I think, the best moment of comedy in the whole thing. And it really worked. That had the feeling of the early Harrison Ford Han Solo bits that sort of work as comedy.
Sonny00:50:34And also the shootout with IG-11. Yeah. Where the robot keeps being like, I am about to initiate self-destruct. Don't do it.
JVL00:50:41Don't blow yourself up. That stuff I thought really worked. The Werner Herzog stuff really worked. But I have some structural criticisms of it. One of which is that I find it, trying to ask a guy to carry the entire series from behind a mask, I just don't think it can be done. I mean, were you not getting any part of his face to see at all? At some point, maybe we will. Maybe at the end of the season. No, but the point is that he's not being able to ask somebody to act with only the voice and nothing else the whole way. No eyes. I just think it doesn't really work to carry the story. Do you guys disagree?
Vic00:51:27I was hoping that we'd see him without the mask at some point, but then I got used to it and it worked for me.
Sonny00:51:32Yeah, I think it works. I think it works as a choice because, again, the facelessness of it lends itself to the episodic nature of it.
Vic00:51:42I also like...
Sonny00:51:44Yeah, go ahead, Sonny. I don't know. I mean, it just feels like he's a guy who shows up in different situations and he's the A-team. But it's hard to care about him. I think.
Vic00:51:53I like...
JVL00:51:54He doesn't sell as being heavy. I don't care about anything, though.
Vic00:51:58It's an interesting story about who the Mandalorians are, you know what I mean? And what is this thing that they do? Well, you know, this is the way. This is the way. This is the way.
JVL00:52:05The expanded universe is a...
Sonny00:52:07I do like that they're doling out the information about the Mandalorians. Yes, I like that, too. It's like, you know, they're kind of... This is the way.
JVL00:52:14I talked to Jon Podharts about this yesterday. Oh, boy. And he loves it. And he said, don't you... Don't you go on your stupid show complaining about how... Too late. Too late. It doesn't do it right. The sort of grab-thar from the expanded universe should have been there. Don't do that.
Vic00:52:30He loves doing that. And so I say none of my complaints are that.
JVL00:52:33But my big complaint is that it is actually not structured like a TV show. It is actually structured like a video game.
Sonny00:52:42Oh, yes. Very much.
JVL00:52:43Where there are NPCs, you are the player, the Mandalorian, and he doesn't have a face that we can all identify with him, and you are going from quest to quest and the NPC to NPC, and you have to get your upgrades with your new piece of armor or your whistling sparrows. Or you earn your signet.
Sonny00:53:01That is exactly what I thought when they were... I thought they would do that going back to the armorer at every episode, and he would get a new thing. And I was like, okay, this is exactly like upgrading in a video game. He's just going and getting new weapons. Here's your quest.
JVL00:53:16Here's your mini game. Go get the egg. And if you get the egg, you can get the... He's literally getting the egg. It looks like a good egg.
Vic00:53:22I wanted to try that.
JVL00:53:23The other characters aren't really characters. They're just NPCs. I found it disconcerting how much it felt like Mandalorian the game.
Sonny00:53:35Feels very, very much like a video game.
JVL00:53:37I agree with you.
Vic00:53:38You know what? I like the idea that five years after the Empire's destroyed, it's all crap. You know what I mean? It's the Republic.
JVL00:53:46Yeah. Things aren't so good now, are they?
Vic00:53:49I knew you were thinking about that. Things would have been better.
JVL00:53:52It's fashionable.
Vic00:53:53There's no order. You know, crime was low.
JVL00:53:55Are you guys at all bothered by Mando's anti-droid bigotry? No, and I'll tell you why.
Vic00:54:06Because, no, you've got to put it in context because they've always been at that time. At that time, they all felt that way about the droids. It's like Jefferson, right? It's different now.
JVL00:54:14Of course Jefferson had slaves. It's different now.
Sonny00:54:15It's just different now. I love droids now.
JVL00:54:19I'll marry a droid. Your first order morals into a post-empire construct.
Vic00:54:26Yeah, yeah. It's a long time ago. Not just in the galaxy far away, but it's a long time ago. So, yeah, no, I didn't have that problem. I think it's remarkable Baby Yoda because I don't see any strings at all. I don't know where they have Baby Yoda. Like, the hand is inside. Is Baby Yoda practical?
Sonny00:54:41I think almost entirely practical.
Vic00:54:43You're kidding me.
Sonny00:54:45I assumed it was all CGI.
Vic00:54:47No, I think that's the reason why the character works. Correct, because it's like, as opposed to, remember Fake Yoda versus Puppet Yoda, right?
JVL00:54:54So, as I am, I have real antennae for cloying Star Wars creature design. Like, I hate the Ewoks. Sure, sure. Hate Jar Jar.
Sonny00:55:07What about the Porgs?
JVL00:55:07Hate the Porgs. Oh, the Porgs are great. Hate all of that stuff.
Sonny00:55:10Speaking of cruelty, I re-watched The Last Jedi before this, and the funniest thing in The Last Jedi is when Chewbacca is eating the Porg, and then it flashes to the face of the other Porg who is watching his Porg friend get eaten, and I'm just like, this is funny because it's cruel, and all humor is cruel, at heart.
Vic00:55:28Yeah, and doesn't he stop eating it?
Sonny00:55:31No, he keeps eating it, and he like, oh, I guess he does throw it away, doesn't he? He like, knocks the Porg away, and then he throws it away.
JVL00:55:37You know, that makes it better, having killed him. And then just to waste the flash.
Vic00:55:40He died in vain, but now he's Porg-free.
JVL00:55:42I gotta say that Baby Yoda, as a, everything about that character is perfect. It is no surprise to me that it went viral and has become a cultural thing because the character design is perfect. This is the way, Baby Yoda is himself the perfect way to take a legacy piece of intellectual property and move forward with it. Yeah. Right? I mean, it is this thing that we all basically know and love, but turned into a totally new thing that is, it's on its own, like, just different enough to latch on. And I just a huge, huge, and this is the power of Star Wars, the ability to make, even in just five episodes worth of their first Disney Plus show, a character who will be absolutely iconic for years and years and years to come.
Vic00:56:38Do you disagree? No, no. I love Baby Yoda. And one of the reasons is what I call, he's what I call a noble baby, which is there are certain babies that have such a nice, genteel sensibility about them. They're rather quite pleasant. And a lot of babies are not like that. But he's not an annoying baby. He's not obnoxious. He eats frogs. He eats frogs. Good. That's funny stuff. But he's not beat you over the head with one thing or another kind of a thing. You know, he's not, you know, it's like in a lot of these sitcoms when they bring in, the family gets older, they got to bring in the new little kid like that just to spice things up so we could extend it for a couple more seasons. That is not the case. Baby Yoda is nice. Victorino. Yes. JVL. In the very, very opening of the pilot.
JVL00:57:19When he apprehends the fish guy. Yes. Did you notice what the fish guy. So first of all, they answer the question fans have been asking ever forever about the toilet. But did you catch what he says about his molt? Yeah, he's I haven't molted in. Oh, and then he's hoping to be done by Life Day.
Vic00:57:39Yeah. Okay. What? Everyone loved that. And people love that.
JVL00:57:43Life Day. Life Day is the made up Star Wars Christmas for Wookiee. It's the callback to the.
Vic00:57:49Great. Star Wars Christmas special. Oh, that's. Wow. Life Day was the day. That's great. How great was that? That's really good. Okay. I missed that.
JVL00:57:58And I thought the fan service was almost exactly titrated the right way throughout. Did you disagree? It was never too heavy for me. Yeah. I found most of it to kind of delightful. I thought it was fine.
Vic00:58:11Are foundlings orphans?
Sonny00:58:14That is the sense. They're like younglings.
Vic00:58:15I think foundlings greater sign younglings. Oh, good. That's so.
JVL00:58:20You know what else I want to know about? What? So fixing the fuel leak on a starship that is capable of intergalactic and interstellar travel. Yes. Do you think this is just a line that goes from the gas tank over to the. Is that how fuel works? It's not a. It's not a reactor, which is based on fusion.
Sonny00:58:42Well, the reactor creates the fuel and then it shoots through the pipe to the engine. To the engine. Which actually have turbines. I don't know if you noticed that.
JVL00:58:51I saw that. But the ship's engines are turbine based. How else would you get the ship to move?
Sonny00:58:56Yeah. Why not just have. Haven't you ever seen an airplane?
JVL00:58:59Rotary. You know what? It's because I've been spending too much time on the Expanse, but there were a bunch of things in there that I just looked at and I was like, well, that's preposterous. Okay. All right. You didn't think we'd have enough to talk about, Sonny.
Vic00:59:12I knew we would. We spent three hours.
Sonny00:59:14We spent 15 minutes on The Last Jedi, relitigating The Last Jedi. That's right.
Vic00:59:19Okay. Good. That is all the time we're given to this episode. Questions, comments, complaints, compliments. Tweet us at SonnyBunch, at Victorino Matus. Again, be sure to subscribe to us on iTunes, Google Play, Stitcher. Just type in Sub-Beacon at a podcast. We're there. Leave a review. Tell your friends. Until next time. Did you have something?
JVL00:59:46I don't really. I was hoping you guys have something. Well, you're not. I believe this. Do you want to talk about this morning? What was that?
Vic00:59:52Oh, no, no. Oh, no, I don't. I don't. It was good. It was good. That's why I was five minutes late to the office. Sorry, I'm late. You are? You are? Yes. Yes. I'm normally here. It's 906. Okay. Even Sonny is about to break.
JVL01:00:10I don't know.
Vic01:00:12He's this close to breaking.
JVL01:00:13I love you, honey.
Vic01:00:14Okay. No. But speaking of which, speaking of which, guess what? The restaurant opened. It opened up around the corner. Fagolina? Happy Endings. Happy Endings is the Pan-Asian restaurant called Happy. They do a play on it because they do another place that sells crawfish in Falls Church called Chase and Tails. So it's like jokes on us. I was like, oh, jokes on them. No, jokes on us. And so Happy Endings is like all sorts of different Asian things that you can get. Where is this? This is next to the Little Beat, which is right there off of North Flynn. Today was opening day. So I went to Happy Endings. And let me tell you something. First time. So it's a little bit sloppy and they're not sure of themselves. You know, they're not they don't know what they're doing. They're a little lot of fumbling going around. We're messy. But in the end, it was it was it was really good. I quite I quite liked it. The broth is a little salty. It's true. The flow is the menu price.
JVL01:01:10One thing. But then you have to have a gratuity.
Vic01:01:12You do have to add. You do have to add. Is there a 10% the secret menu? Yeah, but I'll definitely be coming back for more.
JVL01:01:23Yes, sure. It's fine.

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